GOLDEN BUBBLE -14

THE STASI INVESTIGATION CONTINUED

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This part is like combing knots out of long hair.   You comb through the first bit and untangle the knots, then you go a little higher and so on till the hair is shiny and smooth.    Start with the first paragraph.

PARAGRAPH

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ASK:

• What is the function of this paragraph?   Does it introduce? Inform? Develop? Allow space for the passage of time? Create essential breathing space?  Link? Entertain? Resolve?  Every paragraph should be essential to the whole.

• Would the piece work as well without it?   Writers are always tempted to hang on to passages they’re pleased with.    BUT, if they are not essential they will clog up your text.  Removing them makes your writing more vital for the reader. Read the page ALOUD with the paragraph, then read it  ALOUD without.    Which works best?   Still in doubt?   Put it in your LEFTOVERS file, you may find a use for it later..

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• Are  the sentences in this paragraph in the most effective order?  When you read this paragraph, is there something unsatisfactory you can’t quite put your finger on?   This may be because a misplaced sentence is causing a tiny disturbance in logic .   Check the sequence of thought and move the sentence to the appropriate place.

SENTENCES.

ASK:

• What is the function of this sentence? Every sentence must  work to inform, explain, describe, develop the argument, develop the plot, develop the character, set a scene, create an atmosphere etc.

• Would the paragraph work just as well without it?   If in doubt, check that it is in the right place (see above). Read the paragraph aloud with the sentence, then read it ALOUD without the sentence.    Which works best?   If in doubt move the sentence to LEFTOVERS file.

• Is there any hint of cliché?    If the answer is yes, re phrase.

• Are there any unnecessary words?     We all use words and phrases  when speaking to bridge a conversational gap or give us thinking time. (E.g.    Well…   very…  absolutely…  the thing about it is….   as a matter of fact….   Most people consider… etc. etc. etc.) And these words and phrases often slip into our writing. Cut them out.

• Is there a better way to express this idea? Some sentences will be accurate but awkward.   See if you can find  a more elegant/ interesting/accurate way to express it.

TRUST YOUR IMAGINATION.  

TRUST YOUR INTUITION.  

TRUST YOUR GUT.

PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO ANY PART OF YOUR WRITING THAT CAUSES  EVEN THE SLIGHTEST SENSE OF UNEASE